I was surprised at how simple the application process for graduation was. All that the online form needed was the submission of correct contact information and confirmation of my major and minor.
I found it almost anticlimactic how easy the process was. When I received the email reminding me to apply for graduation, my mind began racing. Not only was it one more thing on the to-do list, the thought of yet another “application” had me wondering. How extensive was this application? Was it anything like applying to college? Did I have to write an essay? Could I be turned down based on my response?
Thankfully, it was nothing like I predicted. All I had to do was confirm my contact information, specify my major, and verify that I had enough credits to graduate in May. Although I had known that I planned on graduating in May of 2019 since arriving at Capital, the sudden realization that 2019 was only a few months away hit me hard.
I was struck with a mix of emotions. They were all emotions that I had felt before, but never this mixture all at once. There was excitement but it was shadowed with worry. It seemed like I had just gotten into the routine of college when now it was all about to change. I had only just gotten comfortable, and I was applying to formally exit my comfort zone.
Uncertainty began to surface, specifically about what I would be doing after I left Capital. Where would I end up? What would I be doing? Did the decisions I made over a quick four years at Capital set me up for success? It was easy to get caught up in all the possible scenarios that could take place upon my departure.
It was especially easy for my mind to slip into the bad scenarios. But then something else came to me. I thought back to when I graduated high school, and my notion of what college would be like. My years here have been so radically different than the picture I formulated in my head about what I thought college would be like back in summer 2015. In so many ways, both good and bad, I was wrong.
I reminded myself of this as I got my mind back on track. I also reminded myself that I have over a semester left at Capital. Very much could change in that comparatively short time, and I still have a lot to do in preparation for graduation. Fear of the future is only natural, but life gets inefficient when you let it cripple you. Though I have applied to graduate, my time here is not over and there is still work to be done.
