BREAKING: Zombie outbreak reported on campus
The following is a work of fiction based on the zombie outbreak professional development event at Capital University. BREAKING: Last night, Wednesday, Sept. 27, a …
Category: Satire
New species of bird found living on President Trump’s head
On Wednesday afternoon, the scientific world was rocked when a new species of bird was discovered in the unlikeliest of places: atop President Donald J. …
Provost welcomes students to new yurt
In an effort to be more accessible to students, recently appointed provost and vice president of learning Jody Funion announced that he will be relocating …
Aramark plans to add healthy lifestyle options for students
As Aramark announces its new 10-year contract as the food provider for Capital University, the management team has also launched its plans to increase the …
Film program looks to give students actual chance at a career
As the 2016-17 academic year comes to a close, students make their frenzied march toward graduation with thoughts of summer, freedom and, of course, job …
Group of faculty get all news from the Chimes
In an age where fake news is around every corner and national news outlets pander to the lowest common denominator of viewers, a small group …