Chimes shrinks publication to once a year
*The following is a work of satire* In response to a dwindling demand for news and a lacking supply of resources, the Chimes student newspaper …
Category: Satire
Albus the Albino Squirrel Claims His Most Recent Victim
*The following is a work of satire* In September of 2015, now senior Jane Bichols was attacked by a bat upon exiting Blackmore Library and …
Bexley Fire Department Grateful for Weekly Lohman Fire Drills
*The following is a work of satire* The Fire Department of Bexley, Ohio has issued a letter of gratitude to Capital University, particularly to the …
Capital University welcomes Chris Jamison as new Voice faculty
*The following is a work of satire* Interim dean of the conservatory of music, Carol Strawberry, announced this week that Chris Jamison will be the …
Capital introduces white cultural studies, classes to begin next fall
*The following is a work of satire* In an effort to provide balance, the university plans to introduce a new white cultural studies department, with …
Newly elected university president rides the Drunk Bus
*The following is a work of satire* This past February, Bethany Stahl was elected the 16th president of Capital University. Attempting to get to know …