Satire: Murderous ravens and parrot wreak havoc on campus
Capital Communications released a health advisory two days ago in response to the student tradition of licking the unnamed blue art piece diagonal from Blackmore …
Category: Campus News
Satire: Students discover meth lab in Renner Hall
Capital University’s Renner Hall was recently under investigation as a potential meth lab. Students started to complain about questionable equipment seen in and around the …
Satire: Capital Athletics is starting Slap Fight team, with Will Smith as the coach
The Capital University athletics department has announced the forming of a new sports team on campus, as slap fighting becomes an official university-affiliated sport. Interim …
Satire: China’s Belt and Road Initiative comes to Capital University
In a stunning announcement, Capital University president Dove Coughwoman announced a plan for Capital University to receive funding from China’s Belt and Road Initiative, the …
Capital cars struck by converter burglar
People have been stealing cars, or at least parts of cars, since they were invented over 120 years ago. Capital University was recently the site …
Examining the state of Capital’s dining experience
Capital currently is using Aladdin Campus Dining to make food for students with meal plans, but let’s take a look at the overall dining experience. …